A Turn for the Better - Wednesday, January 11th - Day 7

Today was the first day that my mom actually LOOKED and BEHAVED better. She had color back in her face and cheeks, could talk to us without falling asleep, could understand us...basically we could have a normal conversation with her. She was also feeling less pain, though they kept her on pain meds all day. I felt cautiously optimistic, but there was still a long way to go. My mom was still getting the dressings on her leg changed three times a day since she had the operation on her leg. And she was still not eating much of anything, always saying that it all tasted the same or that she just didn't like it. And she was still in a lot of pain and was medicated every 4 or 5 hours for the pain. So there really wasn't anything interesting about this day, or at least I cant recall anything.

However, today (and still) we were now required to wear yellow paper gowns and latex gloves when we went in to see my mom. This is because she has some very highly resistant bacteria that only responds to a few antibiotics. That was kinda cool at first...I felt like I doctor. Now it's getting to be a drag. I look hilaious. The thing is huge. The belt tie thingie goes around me twice. Oh well. If it protects my mom, it's worth it.

I do know that since my mom got sick, even those months before the hospitalization, I feel like I haven't had a day to myself. I know that sounds spoiled and selfish, and I guess maybe it is a little. For the longest time I didn't do anything and now for the past two months or more I've spent most every day doing things for my mom and dad, grown up things that I've always been afraid to do. It just tires me out so much and makes me feel like I don't have a life of my own. I'm either at the hospital, at my parents' cleaning their house, at home working with their finances, or asleep. I don't get sick days or vacation days or get to play hooky.

Not that I had much of a life before...that's what makes it so hard. I am used to having all this free me time to do whatever I want and now I don't. I'm not whining about this though, just stating a fact. But I was probably one of the few lucky ones who had that time, because most people WORK for living. Although I wish this wasn't happening to my mom, I feel that this is the most important job I will ever have, one that I will never quit or even take a day off from.