I guess things are looking up...

Once again I say, stupid insurance companies!!!

On Friday the 10^th I got a call from the woman working at social services where my mom is staying. She said that my mom's insurance company could have her going home as soon as the 13^th…giving us 72 hours to get ready to have her come home. Fortunately that didn't happen and as I mentioned earlier, she is coming home this Friday, the 17^th. I don't think she's ready and neither do most of the staff, but the insurance company has their criteria so that is that. While I am excited that she is coming home, I am also very nervous. So here are the insurance company's criteria for someone coming home:

-They look at how much the client has improved since they came to the facility. Will they be able to continue to improve once they go home? Are they doing better then they did when they arrived at the facility?

-How well are they doing now as compared to their prior functioning level when they entered the facility (similar to the first one I guess)? She doesn't have to be doing as well as she was before she entered the facility, but she has to at least be doing what the insurance company thinks are things that deem her ready to go home.

To me, she still needs around the clock care, but the insurance company doesn't think so. She is in a lot less pain, but still has days when it is very hard for her to get out of bed. However, she hasn't had one of those days where she is just bawling in bed. This is due in part to physical therapy but mostly to around the clock meds. She now gets pain meds around the clock, every 6 hours, with a less strong med in between if she has breakthrough pain. So all in all she is doing better, but I think she could use a few more weeks there.

So according to the insurance company, she is able to do the following, so she can come home:

-transfer herself from a wheelchair to her bed and vice-versa, and also from her bed to a walker and vice-versa

-get out of bed on her own

-change positions in bed (I've never seen her do this; most of the time she's afraid to move because she still hurts quite a bit when she does)

-she has improved in physical therapy

But she still has problems in physical therapy sometimes, like dizziness or pain and has to cut the sessions short, and she can't walk very far in her walker, but the insurance company doesn't have to experience that, so oh well on their side I guess.The social worker gave me the name of some programs that she said might be helpful for my mom in terms of caring for her at home. These places are not covered by her insurance, however. Also, she will have a physical therapist coming out soon after she comes home to work with her. This is covered, until the insurance company doesn't thinks she needs it anymore. That same day I called one of the places that the social worker recommended and immediately liked the person I talked to, so we set up a meeting at the facility for Saturday the 11^th.

The Meeting

The woman that my mom and I met with was very nice. What was also cool was that my mom was able to sit up in her wheelchair for a long time, during the meeting and then afterward when we went back to her room to discuss what we talked about in the meeting.

So this service will do the following for my mom:

-bathing assistance (basically helping my mom with showers, which I cannot do)

-dressing assistance

-grooming assistance

-medication management (if I set up her meds, they will help her remember to take them)

-ambulation assistance (help her get around)

-transportation (I think I'll take care of most of this)

-light housekeeping (including vacuuming, dusting, laundry – I can do the laundry, changing sheets, doing dishes, cleaning the bathroom my mom will be using, picking up after my mom and generally making things "neat")

-safety supervision

-planning and preparing nutritious meals

-companionship

While this all sounds great, it's not cheap. We have decided on 4 hour per day, 4 days a week. On the days they are not there, I will be as long as I feel like I can. Basically, the money my parents were giving me to help me pay my bills each month and give me a little extra spending money will be going toward this, so Jeff will be supporting me and I'll have no extra spending money. And he is not happy about this because of course he will have less money. But if it'll help my mom, she's better off with the money than I am.

My mom thinks it's best to have them come 2 hours in the morning and two in the evening. We will be having a meeting this Saturday with whoever will be working with my mom if I can get in touch with them and kind of figure out what they will be doing and when. Of course helping with showering and such in the morning and cooking in the evening, and hopefully some housekeeping in there somewhere. Four hours doesn't sound like a lot of time to get much housekeeping done (or really 2 hours at a time). We're jus going to play things by ear.

Basically my mom will be mostly using a wheelchair to begin with and she can use the walker a bit. I don't want her staying in bed all day and I'm hoping the ladies who come and help her will make sure she doesn't. I am hoping I can play a more active role as well this time since I will have more of a "break" in terms of having to go over so often for so long, and not having to worry about not being able to go over if I don't feel well.

The Endocrinologist

So on Sunday and Monday I wasn't feeling well and stayed home. On Tuesday the 14^th we HAD to go to the endo because we had been waiting for TWO MONTHS to see him. He showed me her calcium levels and they weren't too good. Nine to ten is pretty "normal," and her last level, taken in Oct., was 12.5. We had labs taken again yesterday. We explained what her ear, nose, and throat doc had said, about how he could not see her parathyroid on the x-ray, would end up having to "dig around" to find it, that risks would outweigh the benefits, and he pretty much scared us into not having the surgery. But the endo said he thought that the ENT would be able to find it and that he thought my mom REALLY should have it out and should see the ENT about it again. That will be in late Nov. He also said to see her primary care physician to make sure she is healthy enough to have the surgery. I am going to have her see her new PCP for this rather than her current one, and then we will go from there. So yeah, another surgery for me to freak out about. I mean, geez that sounds selfish. My poor mom having to go through this again. Of course it's worse for her than it is for me. How could I say that? How awful of me. She has been through so much, and now another surgery. But I am really scared. What if the ENT can't find the parathyroid? What if there are complications? I asked the endo if we should get a second opinion and he said that the ENT was very experienced in this area and he would highly recommend him. When I told her endo about my mom having the compression fracture, he said that the hyperparathyroidism is what caused it.

One and one half days

So that's pretty much it for now. Just waiting to hear back from the home care place so we can plan out a schedule. My mom would like to meet with them at home on Saturday because she would like to just have a quiet Friday to herself when she gets home, and then they can start on Sunday. Hopefully this will all work out and between the agency and me we will be able to help her get back to doing most of what she was able to on her own again. And I am also hoping that some of the procedures that her new doctor recommended will help. I am very excited about them based on what I've read on the 'net. I just hope they DO work.. Wish us luck for Friday.